Women on Fire

I have found my spark and my match has been lit. It is very exciting and I have been so inspired because of a wonderful organization called Women on Fire founded by Debbie Phillips.

Women on Fire is an amazingly uplifting organization that brings women together and offers inspiration, strategies, and support. Recently I listened, again, to 7 Mistakes Preventing You From Being a Woman on Fire! CD, and was encouraged and optimistic about me and my journey! So I thought I would share with you the 7 Mistakes that Debbie has identified:

Mistake 1: Failure to cheer on the successes of other women


Mistake 2: Not asking for help


Mistake 3: Not investing in self and your potential


Mistake 4: Having a lack of awareness on your powerful impact on others


Mistake 5: Forgetting to appreciate, honor, credit, and celebrate those who have helped you along your path


Mistake 6: Not stepping into your own brilliance and playing small


Mistake 7: Comparing yourself to anyone

I know that each mistake I have made – some, a few thousand times – but instead of feeling defeated, the CD was thought-provoking and I was energized to learn from my mistakes.

photo credit: livewellstressless.info

Perhaps most notably for me, is mistake number six. Playing small and blending into the background was like an old, very worn, tattered, sweatshirt that I once cherished. For years, I knew it was time to throw it away, but I couldn’t. I didn’t. I wouldn’t. It was my go-to shirt when I had a bad day, or felt overwhelmed, or cranky. I could curl up in it and hide. It was oddly reassuring and way too comfortable to get rid of it. Or so I thought. I ignored that it was full of holes, ripped in various places, frayed at the ends and had been stretched out so much that it no longer fit me. And then one day, after a few comments from my husband about my raggedy attire, I realized that he was right and the sweatshirt went out with the trash. The garb had served its purpose, but it no longer fit me. Similarly, I am beginning to realize that playing small, while it definitely has had a principal role in my life, no longer suits me and who I want to become. So I am proud to say that step by step, I am moving away from the “small me” and one day, soon, I will confidently walk into my own brilliance.

According to Debbie, a Woman on Fire is “someone who is safe enough and aware enough that she can authentically live from her heart. She is in touch with ‘what is it I am in this world to do and am I on my path to doing that?’” I know I am not yet on fire…but have started my kindling.

Thanks Debbie!






*It important for me to let you know that I wanted to share my thoughts about Women on Fire because I have had such a wonderful experience and have learned so much.  No one asked me to write this, nor have I been compensated in any way.

Breathe.

Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.

~Oprah Winfrey

Vacation Bliss!

Last week we had our family vacation in North Carolina's Crystal Coast. 

It was blissful!

 We visited my parents and both of my brothers and my niece joined us!

The cousins loved hanging out together!

We went crabbing and clamming at the NC Aquarium...

And even caught some big enough to take home...YUMMY!

 

We had lots of Beach Time...

digging in the sand,

riding the waves,

swimming in the ocean,

and simply relaxing!

I even got to spend my birthday...

watching the dolphins on a 42' catamaran!

It was truly an amazing vacation! 

But what I love most...

were the memories that were made!

Introducing Catty Patty

I would like you to meet Catty Patty.

She is a Bitch!

She often tells me that I am nothing special and lets me know, in her subtle way, that most of what I do is NOT “good enough”. She’s skinnier than me, beautiful, and seemingly incredibly confident. When I am faced with a challenge, she tells me that I can’t succeed and encourages me to quit. When walking down a street together, she constantly compares me to others. She’ll tell me that I am fatter, or not as attractive, or plainer than other women. And, sometimes, when I think Catty Patty’s being nice, she points out someone else’s flaws, decides that I am “better”, and I almost like her. Other times, she simply compares me to my past self. When I decide to try to lose weight, or eat healthier, or change a bad habit, she reminds me of all the times I have failed in the past. And worst of all, she is a big-time “should-er”. Constantly telling me I should be thinner and healthier, and I should run farther, be faster, exercise more and I should be a better mom, friend, wife, and sister, and I should do and know more, and I should…(the list seems infinite).

I don’t really like her, yet she almost always with me. When I tell her to leave, she goes away, for a little while. But, before I know it she has crept back into my life, sharing her mean thoughts, eroding my confidence, and getting in the way of my dreams.

Although she has been around, seemingly, forever, I was just introduced to her, this week, at Reform School…Inner Mean Girl Reform School…and, yep, Catty Patty is my Inner Mean Girl.

Inner Mean Girl Reform School; Where Women Come to Transform Inner Critics Into Inner Superheroines, created by Amy Ahlers* and Christine Arylo* is a 10 week self-directed course filled with audio classes, worksheets, introspective activities, and self-discovery. This is my first week of class, and I am so excited about this experience. During the first week I was instructed to get to know my Inner Mean Girl.

And, I feel like I am starting getting to know her. I have identified that Catty Patty is a perfectionist and loves comparisons. She rears her ugly head when I am trying on clothes in the department store dressing room, and when I need to look good for an event. When I am trying to something new, like training for a half marathon, she appears just when I at the cusp of being successful. Catty Patty even arrives when I am successfully accomplishing a goal, telling me that my triumph wasn’t that special and ruining my celebrations. And, of course, she is sure to be around when life isn’t going well, often encouraging me to isolate myself.

Catty Patty is the one inside my head who beats me up and brings me down. But, surprisingly, it is nice to meet her. Giving that voice a name and separating her from me is incredibly powerful!

Suddenly, her thoughts do not have to be my thoughts and her words do not have to be truths!

I know that this is just the beginning of this journey of transforming my relationship with my inner critic and I am looking forward to the rest of the experience.

Who's your inner mean girl?

*It is important to note that I have not been asked to share my experiences with Inner Mean Girl Reform School nor am I receiving any compensation.  In fact, I have never met or talked to Amy or Christine.  I am simply having a great experience and wanted to share.

I'm Back!

Throughout the summer, I took a bit of a blogging hiatus. But I and SO excited to be back!

Without my blog…
I stayed in my comfort zone and did not challenging myself and became complacent. My commitment to “finding myself” was gone and, instead, I found myself in a funk of indifference.

But in the past few weeks, as I realized all that I was missing, I started getting more and more interested, again, in challenging and improving myself. There are so many topics that I look forward to exploring during my renewed Search of Me in Mommy. They include…

• My experiences with Inner Mean Girl Reform School that I started this past weekend! I hope to better understand how to tame my negative self talk that, currently, I am drowning in.
• My fear of failure…perhaps most recently evident in my half marathon training, but surrounds me in most of my life decisions and choices.
• Women on Fire…I am SO inspired and am beginning to find my own little spark.
• Motivating Other Moms...a wonderful place - that is as it should be everywhere - Moms supporting, and encouraging other moms!
• And, of course, Motherhood…the good, the bad, and the evil.
• Plus much more!

I am very feeling so motivated and invigorated!  I hope you will join me - maybe we can learn together!

 

I miss it!

So...I have been waffling and not very consistent on my blog.  It all started with summer.  I have stopped reading most blogs that I follow, my posts have been sporadic at best and my mind has been elsewhere.  Things got crazy, I got busy and was having a hard time figuring out what to write about.

And guess what - I miss it!  I miss In Search of Me in Mommy! 

I miss the commitment to improving myself.  I miss the schedule of "needing" post 5-6 times a week, as that is something exclusively mine.  I miss reading other people's thoughts and being inspired.  I miss getting comments and hearing other's thoughts and ideas.  I miss the art taking jumbled thoughts and emotions and putting it together in to words, stories, and releasing wonderful Aha moments in to the blogosphere...

So, mark you calendars - or at least I will mark mine - on Monday, August 9, 2010 upon returning from a vacation In Search of Me in Mommy will be back.

YEAH!

Half Marathon Training Week 8 and 9

I have been remiss in updating my blog about my half marathon training.  So here is a review of the past 2 weeks.

Week 8 was horrid!  I was overwhelmed and felt sluggish, slow, and lazy.  My workouts were:

Monday 7/12/10 Run - VBS to Mill Stream to home - 4.02 miles 13:49 pace

Felt good - first run outside that far.

Thursday 7/15/10 Run - Treadmill - 3 miles 12:39 pace

I missed 2 days prior and it was hard to get back - but I did.
 
Saturday 7/17/10 Run/Walk - Fort Hill Loop Trail - 4.5 miles 13:46 pace
After climbing 136 stairs I ran/walked the off road dirt trail - 6 times around the loop - distance is estimated. Hot, hot, hot...and humid. It was fun to do a trail - something different!

Week 9 I kicked ass!  I figured that I need to just simply (if only it was simple) DO IT!  So, I did!  (21.25 miles to be exact)

Monday 7/19/10 Run - Treadmill 5 miles 13:02 pace
Felt GREAT! I thought that I would NEVER get past 4 miles...but I did and I felt POWERFUL! Yeah!

Tuesday 7/20/10 Run - Treadmill 3 miles 12:20 pace
Good Run!

Thursday 7/22/10 Run - Treadmill - 3 miles 12:35 pace
I felt slow and stiff...my legs felt like bricks.

Saturday 7/24/10 Run - Lake to Lake to Bagley to Front - 3.3 miles 14:03 pace
Hot, Hot, Hot...Humid - it felt like I had been transported into a tropical rainforest. Slow, but did it.

Sunday 7/25/10 Run/Walk - Lake to Lake to Big Creek to Main St. - 6.85 miles 14:13 pace
I planning to do a 6 mile loop - but when I got home, I mapped it, because of a road closed, it ended up being 6.85 miles.  It was hard and I was so SORE that night - but the next day the achiness was pretty much gone!  And it was such a high to accomplish a distance that I have NEVER done before!


I am finding that SO much of this is mental.  Overcoming my negative self-talk and feeling overwhelmed is truly the biggest hurdles!

If anyone has any tips about creating a positve mental attitude for my training, please share!