Whindingdilly moments...

My favorite book when I was a kid was The Whingdingdilly, by Bill Peet. In fact, before I left for college, I absconded my parent’s copy and I have kept it all these years. When I was working with college students, I used the book in a leadership presentation. Recently I read it to my boys and was again, reminded of its important message.

In the book, Scamp, a typically happy, carefree farm dog had become a bit glum. He was tired of being a dog and wanted to be a beautiful show horse, like the one on a nearby farm. After getting upset with his owner after being called a “silly ole dog”, Scamp ran away. He ran into a forest where he met a witch. The witch, of course psychic, knew that Scamp wanted to become a horse. Instead, she offered to turn the dog in to something better… “A marvelous magnificent something, I call a whingdingdilly.” Scamp excitedly agreed, and the witch did her magic…Scamp became a unique being – a conglomeration of various animal parts, and his new life began. The story goes into the various mishaps and craziness that Scamp experiences as the Whindingdilly. He finds that his dreams of being admired and fantastic, was not as wonderful as he expected. Finally, he is turned back into a farm dog, and he is overjoyed to be himself again.

As I read this book, again for the umpteenth billionth time, I could really relate to Scamp. Throughout my adult life, I have tried on various different “Me-s” – I found pieces of me here and there. Some pieces easily fit, and other times I would try to force an elephant ear onto my rhino face. I have dreamed many different lives, and some dreams became a reality, and others I had to let go. Like Scamp, I have wanted to be someone I am not, I have admired some people to the point of envy, and I have paid the cost of not being true to myself. As I get older, I am finding that I am more and more comfortable in my own skin. And, at times, am able to love myself and be myself – with no apologies. But I am sure I will have more whindingdilly moments. But, that is ok! …Because every one of those moments bring more Scamp moments and teaches me how to be a more authentic me.

Assessed and Curious...

In the spirit of having a purposeful journey to rediscover myself, over the past month, I have taken various assessments (personality, career, etc.). Some of the tests were goofy like Facebook’s Dr. Seuss Personality Test that said I was “Sam I Am”. And since I like green eggs and ham, I am good with that – but I am not sure how helpful it is.

However there were some tests, like The Holland Code, the Enneagram, and from Oprah, a “Who Am I Meant to Be?” test, that really made me think and the results seemed to accurately reflect who I am. I have taken many personality tests before, and have always gained some insight, but what I found incredibly interesting, this time, was the common thread I found in these results.

In The Holland Code (http://www.roguecc.edu/counseling/HollandCodes/test.asp) I was identified as SAE. Meaning I scored the highest in Social, Artistic, and Enterprising areas.

For the Enneagram (http://www.9types.com/newtest) my results ended in a tie. I scored highest in two personality types: The Artist and The Peacemaker.

The last quiz that I took that was from O Magazine (http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Who-Am-I-Meant-to-Be) labeled me as “Striving to be Creative”.

While over time, I have come to see myself as creative (previously, I believed that “real artists” had a monopoly on the creativity gene), I never thought of myself as an artist – or that my creativity was anything more than a hobby. But, after taking these assessments and realizing that the common theme is artistic/creativity, I am curious. Curious about what I could do and what I could create…

And what that could mean to my rediscovery.

A Jolt of Happiness

I’m not sure what it was…this morning I was just feeling blah. It could have been about the brown, mucky, sloppy mess of dirty melting snow that we have to deal with every time we walk out the door. It could have been because the house desperately needs a thorough cleaning and I have no motivation to do it. Or that every night (give or take 1 or 2) for the past two weeks I have had some sort of meeting or event and I feel like my husband and I have not had any time together. It could have been many other reasons…but in the end, it doesn’t really matter why – I just was feeling BLAH! So I knew I had to do something. I needed a quick dose of happiness.

Two items came to my mind... 1) During this search for myself, I have came across many different activities that I think, “I would like to try that.” While perusing the internet and reading various blogs, I came across one blog whose author had just finished 365 Days in Photos. I loved the idea taking photos and capturing 1 year of moments.  2) I have also been reading various books about motherhood, happiness, balance, etc. One book that I tend to pick up to remind myself to appreciate who I am and what I have is The Happy Book, by Rachel Kempster and Meg Leder.

So, in the spirit of those two random things, I decided to create personal jolt of happiness. I challenged myself to find and photograph happiness in just 10 minutes. I grabbed my camera, set the kitchen timer, and stated taking pictures. Here are the results:

Our Jar of Marbles...some of these are mine from childhood, some of them are from JT's.  They don't make marbles as beautiful as they once did.

Mocha - our chocolate lab.  She is such a loyal, wonderful dog and for some odd reason, she was scared of the camera... (and clearly not an Alpha).

New Crocs...a hopeful sign of spring.

Dishes painted by my friends at my wedding shower.

The last page of OB's First Year scrapbook - just have to put the book together and it is done!

A wonderful painting that hangs in our master bedroom.  A very good friend of mine's father is the artist.  It is a gift I will always treasure.

And of course, My boys...

And you know what?  After completing it, I Felt Happier!

How would you photograph happiness?...

On your mark, Get set, Go!  (your 10 minutes begins, NOW!)

"We start to realize that there are anodynes in life that help us through the day. I don't care if it's a walk in the park, a look out the window, a good bubble bath - whatever. Even a meal you like, or a friend you want to call. That helps us solve all this stuff in our head."

-Al Pacino

I am thankful for the sanity and clarity that comes from a good bubble bath!

"Special Limited Time Offer"

I was getting ready for the day.  I had big plans to attack my To Do List.  Just as I finished blow drying my hair and was heading to my desk, I heard AB excitedly yell out to me..."Mommy, come and look at our Ball Factory!"  So I took a quick detour to the playroom...

The detour lastest longer than I expected...we all played with the Ball Factory.  Before I knew it, it was time for lunch.  The morning was gone and I accomplished nothing on my To Do List...

My To Do List will be there later...But the Ball Factory was an unexpected bonus in my day.  It was one of those special limited time offer that I am glad did not end while I was off doing "important" things.

"Sometimes the most beautiful scenery is found on the detour road." 

- Dr. Lee Roberson

The Land Overwhelmdom

Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up.

- A. A. Milne

As I write this I am in the land of Overwhelmdom. I have a ton to do and I start one thing and then think about something else, wonder if I should be doing that, switch gears and start a new task, only to continue through this vicious cycle a few billion times and then not complete a thing. Have you ever felt that way? I know I need to get organized, write things down (and/or collect all the notes I have written and combine it into one list), set priorities, tackle one thing at a time, and not throw everything (and the kitchen sink) in to the equation.

Prior to being a SAHM, I was uber organized…my Franklin planner (I am dating myself, I know) was with me everywhere I went. If someone needed to set up a meeting, I was ready. My To Do List was by my side and organized with A, B, and C priorities. I have color-coded notebooks that kept track of various projects. My desk, although cluttered, was a place that I would knock things off my list. When my desk, head, and life would get too messy I dive into one of my favorite things…I would ORGANIZE! I loved to tackle big messes. And I still do – in fact the kid’s toys all have their places. In our playroom each toy’s “home” is labeled, making it easy for the boys to help clean up. When friends are looking for new ways to rearrange or organize their space (whether is be a tiny closet or a “great room”), I thoroughly enjoy checking out the situation and offer creative solutions and suggestions. Even so that, after friends adopted a new baby (their third child), part of my gift (at their request) was helping with them organize baby clothes, toys, and playroom. Oddly, I find that FUN – invigorating even!

So why then do I now have such a hard time organizing my life? My Franklin Planner is gone. And it is too big and bulky anyway. For years, my schedule was defined by my babies’ needs and my schedule was pretty much the same routine day to day – no need to write that down. The random meeting or event I wrote on the family calendar that hung in the kitchen. It worked. But, since the boys started preschool they have more things to do and I am busier with various meetings, volunteering, classes, and activities. We have outgrown the monthly family calendar. So now, I need to figure out the best way to keep life organized. This past weekend, I organized my home office area and developed some filing systems. It felt good and I am excited. But still, some of the daily To Dos are sliding through the cracks. I have tried out various calendars, planners, and to do lists and looked into various organizing system, but none have worked as well as I would like.

So I am looking for advice…do you have any good mommy organizing systems that you use? Specifically I am looking for something that is portable (for meetings) and paper (because I get too much satisfaction of physically taking a pen to paper and crossing things off my list).

‘Cuz what I know for sure, is that when I am organized and accomplishing valued and important tasks, I feel much better than when I am wallowing in the land of Overwhelmdom.

Ekkk...A Facebook Fan Page

Ok, I am officially scared!  Today I decided to figure out how to make a Facebook fan page and connect it to this blog.  I have been considering doing it for sometime - but I have had incredibly mixed emotions doing this.

I typically like to fade into the background and shy away from anything closely resembling a spotlight.  So creating a "fan page" seemed, well, selfish, and went against my nature.  And, maybe it is selfish.  And maybe this whole blogging thing is too.  Regardless, this blog has made me a more purposeful, introspective, and happier person (and a better mom).  AND, as I promised myself when I started this journey, I am going to step outside my comfort zone. 

So...TA DA... 

Look to the Right (see my FB link!!!!)-------------------------------------->

I am undeniably outside of my comfort zone...and, so far, I'm ok with it!