The Half Marathon that wasn't

So on Tuesday I went to the doctors.  THANKFULLY, the MRI showed that all is normal in my brain!  So my headaches are nothing serious.  However, my doctor put me on some medicine, and said that I was able to exercise, but I should not do too much, too fast.  So my half marathon is off.  I have mixed feelings about the outcome.  In someways I am incredibly disappointed but in other ways I am extremely relieved.
In this whole experience, there have been many lessons learned. 

• I never expected to EVER be able to make it as far as I did during training.  The 10 miles of run/walking that I did a few weeks ago is what I will take with me - knowing that I trained and pushed myself to do something that at one point seemed impossible is enough. 
• Also, in the spirit of being true to myself, I have accepted that I do not like running.  I tried (oh how I tried) to like it - but I don't.  Getting out the door to go run is 1million times harder than getting out the door to bike, or swim, or Zumba, or even spinning.  So I will continue to workout, and be healthier - but I am going to focus on what I enjoy!
• Lastly, after being sent to get an MRI, to check for an aneurysm or tumor, shook my world a little.  While I didn't want to overreact or over-dramatize the situation, I couldn't help but wonder about my future.  Not knowing if my headaches were something serious, or not, reminded me of the preciousness of life. 

My husband is still doing the half marathon, so we leave tomorrow for Disney. I will be there to cheer on the runners and watch their amazing accomplishment! 

Good Luck to everyone who is racing!

 

Half Marathon Training Update.

So...I haven't shared about my half marathon training for over two weeks and the last I shared was about my self-sabotage.  Well...soon after that last post, I went out and did 10 miles!  I ran for 3 minutes and then I walked for 2 minutes, I ran for 3 more minutes, and I walked for 2 minutes...and did that pattern 27.5 times.  It felt great and I was incredibly positive and hopeful.  The following weekend I did 11 miles.  It didn't go as smoothly, but nonetheless, I finished the 11 miles at a pace fast enough that had I been in the actual race, I would not of been gathered up in the patty wagon and driven to the finish.  So I felt that, while this wasn't what I had envisioned back when I signed up, it was still an accomplishment to simply finish, and beating the patty wagon was my new goal.

This past weekend my son was sick and I was exhausted, not feeling the top of my game and had a few pretty severe, throbbing headaches, so I laid low.  On Monday, I decided to go for a short 3 mile run, and not even 1/2 mile into the run I felt a killler, throbbing headache coming on and I turned around and walked home.  The throbbing ache was very strong for a good hour and then a dull pain lasted the remained of the night.  To make a long story short, what I came to realize was that in the past 6 days my headaches were all triggered by exerting energy and my heart rate raising.  This was something that I had never experienced before - and I have not been prone to regular headaches or ever had even one migraine. 

So, yesterday I had a doctor's appointment.  After answering all of his questions, following his fingers (with my eyes) up, down, and all around and performing various sobriety tests (which I passed with flying colors - which is a good thing, since I hadn't had a drink for at least 6 hours), my doc sidelined me from any exertion. He wrote a script for a MRI of my brain (just as a precaution) and set an appointment for a follow-up with him.  So this morning, I headed (literally) into a giant medical tube, had dye injected into my vein, and had millions of magnetic waves penetrating my head, imaging my noggin. 

The good news is that the MRI tech said that she saw nothing alarming, but, of course, my doctor will give me the final results.  My follow up appointment is on Tuesday, so until then, I am banded from any exertion.  This weekend I am signed up for a 5k which I will now watch from the sidelines.  And next weekend is the half marathon.  Honestly, I have no idea whether I'll be able to do it or not.

So...I wish I could wrap this up into a pretty bow with an enlightened conclusion, but right now I do not have one.  On Tuesday I will know more...  Until then I am crossing my fingers and wishing for the best - whatever that might be.

Vomitismus...

My oldest son has been sick.
Vomiting from Thursday night until Sunday morning. 

It has been challenging and difficult to see - as all parents know too well.  It is NO fun to have a sick child. 

However, I do have ONE tiny, little itty-bitty, happy piece of news that came out of the four days of vomitismus...

He got most of the "hurl-age" contained to the commode!

I'm sure that this is certaintly not listed as a milestone in any medical journals...but I am wondering...

"Why the F*#@^  not?" 

Major accomplishment.  Major!

Women on Fire Tea Party - a little slice of utopia.

Imagine a world where women come together in the spirit of encouragement, support, and authenticity.  A place where judgments, competition, and insecurities are checked at the door and all are welcomed with open arms!  Where women are simply encouraged to become...  to realize their "true" selves  ...to search inside themselves to tap into their purpose ... and, step by step, become more of who they really are.

Doesn't that sound unreal?

But it's not...
Last night (after driving two hours through horrific thunderstorms and tornado warnings) I found a slice of that utopia and I am so jazzed!

I attended a Women on Fire (WOF) Tea Party and it was amazing!

The WOF Tea Party celebrated each woman, built a sense of sisterhood, embraced and encouraged collaboration, and intrinsically fostered authenticity.  As soon as I arrived, I knew that I was in exactly the right place.

Stories were shared, connections were made, and women came together to celebrate each other and themselves.  Not simply for self-indulgence or to bolster a friend, but to build a community and to renovate and redefine how success happens and what it looks like.  Instead of competition, winning (thus implying that someone else loses), and clawing up the ladder of success, Women on Fire fosters each person's success through support.  The entire tone and spirit of the night, fit me like a glove (and I am not talking an OJ Simpson glove, I am talking soft, warm, cashmere, perfectly-fitting glove)!  It was wonderfully profound!

I SO am looking forward to my next WOF event!...but, I am hoping for better weather and/or a closer location :)  If this sound at all interesting to you I highly reccomend checking out Women on Fire!  WOF Tea Parties are located in various locations across the country - plus you can sign up for a FREE inspirational newsletter. 

I must send a BIG thank you to Andrea and Jerry who lead the tea party with brilliance.  And to Debbie Phillips who founded WOF.  Also a shout out to Rosemary who is a wonderful connector.

Also, it would be important to note that I was not asked to write this post, nor was I compensated. 
My experience at the WOF Tea Party was phenomenal and I just wanted to share!

Being fully alive!

We are never more fully alive, more completely ourselves, or more deeply engrossed in anything than when we are playing.
~Charles Schaefer

50% Off...Little Hands Artwork!

As I have gone through this Search for Me in Mommy over the past 8 months, a lot has changed in my life.  One big change, that I announced on this blog a few months ago, is that I started a business - Little Hands Artwork!

This morning, when I checked the Little Hands Artwork Facebook page, it had just hit 100+ "LIKES"!!!
So I am CELEBRATING by offering a spectacular deal!

Anyone who orders a program by 11:59pm on Saturday, September 18, 2010 will get 50% off any CANVAS PRINT!

Just go to www.LittleHandsArtwork.com and check out the 3 different programs...

The Studio (for up to 8 pieces of artwork)

The Gallery (for 9-12 pieces of artwork)

The Museum (for 13-15 pieces of artwork)

You don't need to choose the pieces of artwork you want to use nor have gather the masterpieces today...

After you order the program, the 50% off coupon will be emailed directly to you

and it doesn't expire until December 31, 2010.

You could use this discount for

Fall & Winter Birthdays...Christmas...Hanukkah...New Years Gifts

or simply treat yourself!

Happy Shopping!

Battle Banana

I swore I wouldn't be that mom.  I knew that my kids would be good eaters.  Certainly if I just exposed them to all different kinds of food, they wouldn't be picky, whiny, or difficult at the dinner table.

Oh, Oh, Oh...I have SO eaten my words!  I am a mom of picky-eaters!  And, *gulp* that is incredibly hard to swallow!

They are SO picky, whiny, and fussy. 

Most meals, I don't even like eating with them!

Recently my 4 year old has been incredibly challenging!  It could be a perfectly prepared dinosaur-shaped chicken nugget, that he requested, and he will whine, "I don't want that..."

I refuse to be a short-order cook, knowing that I would just be encouraging the bad behavior.  So, he sits, at the table with his plate of Stegosauruses, T-Rex's, and Iquanadons FUSSING.

And, I HAVE TO HEAR IT.

He's been sent to our "fussy chair" to settle down and returns to the table only to begin the fussing again.

When it first started, I thought perhaps he was sick, or perhaps he was just over-tired, or perhaps just cranky, or perhaps....  But the meal-time-cranks, have been going on for at least one month...and that is a conservative estimate.

So, my heels are dug in.  And, the battle has begun.  This morning, it is the Battle Banana!

The banana - THAT. HE. ASKED. FOR.

I know that the whining, crying, and fussing will only get worse, before it gets better. 

I have gathered my gear - Patience (check),  Strength (check),  Focus (check) mixed with Love and Caring (check and check).

And, as he screams, for the 15th billion time "I don't want to eat my banana!"...I am trying to keep my anger in check.

Oh...and I have my MP3 player...

This time I might even have to use both ear buds!

Inspiration...

Ring the bells that can still ring.

Forget your perfect offering.

There is a crack in everything.

That's how the light gets in.

                                       ~Leonard Cohen




A big thank you to Amy Ahlers and Christine Arylo who included this inspiration in their Inner Mean Girl Reform School curriculum.  It reminds me to forget about perfection, and to embrace myself, cracks, flaws and all!

Your Night Blooming Cereus Moments...

A week or so ago, a neighbor stop by around 8:30pm in the evening.  He told my husband and I about a flower in his backyard.  The Night Blooming Cereus is a unique plant that blooms one time a year, at night, and the flower only last one night.  I was incredibly intrigued, so I grabbed my camera and headed over to witness this bizarre moment, compliments of Mother Nature.

 

When I first arrived, the flower was just beginning to open up.

 

 

And, about 45 minutes later, the flower had changed drastically...

 

Isn't it simply stunning?!!? Truly, a moment of brilliance!

 

This experience got me thinking more about moments of brillance - specifically of the human-kind. 

While, the Night Blooming Cereus is bold, obvious, and beautiful, I think that our moments of brilliance are more subtle and quiet.  Consequently, I think we have a hard time recognizing and celebrating our brilliance.

When is the last time you...

• Pushed through a challenging moment and saw the glory on the other side?
• Acted upon an inspired idea?
• Authentically shared yourself and built a connection with another person?
• Saw and encouraged the beauty and strength in someone else?
• Saw and encouraged the beauty and strength in yourself?
• Opened yourself up to new ideas, thoughts, and ways of doing things?
• Believed in and stood up for yourself, despite the fear of rejection?
• Failed, but continued to pursue and persist?
• Purposely stepped out of your comfort zone?
• Paid it forward?

Each of those times (plus many others) are your Night Blooming Cereus moments!  Moments where you showed and shared your beauty, your strength, and your gifts. 

Why not take this moment to celebrate yourself... 

 

Half Marathon Training...Self-Sabotage

We must be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.

~Unknown

 

ARGH!  I have been the queen of self-sabotage this week. 

Last week I did an 8 mile run/walk and it felt pretty good.  Then a day or two later I went out and did just over 3 miles and it felt HORRIBLE and I had to walk at the end...WTF?!!?  So between my "it's-the-first-week-of-school-for-the-kids excuse and not feeling positive or motivated, I have successfully done, basically, no training this week.

I know that I am doing this to myself...  It's all mental...

• I am overwhelmed by the concept of 13.1 miles
• I am disappointed that my vision of training for this half marathon has not been my reality
• I am frustrated that I haven't lost weight
• And, I know that I didn't really change my eating habits...probably the main reason why I haven't lost weight
• Plus, I have been trying to be in touch with my Inner Wisdom - but this week my Inner Mean Girl has camped out on my cranium, taking all other thoughts hostage and refuses to relinquish control...or maybe I am just being a little overly dramatic... 

 But the facts remain...I have paid my money, booked my flight, and hotel room, as has my husband, so regardless of my self-sabotage, I am doing this half marathon.

So I know I must move on - literally and figuratively.  This weekend, I have promised myself that I am doing a long run...err, a long run/walk.

I'd like to say "wish me luck"...but really it more about me just getting out there and DO IT!

When you feel like destroying something that you have worked on or worked for or worked toward - that is a sign that there is a need to press harder, to do more, to go past previous boundaries. It also represents that you are at the edge of succeeding.
~Gillian MacBeth-Louthan

27 days until the Half Marathon!

No Hailrails

Quit hanging on to the handrails . . . Let go. Surrender. Go for the ride of your life. Do it every day.

~Melody Beattie, "Finding Your Way Home"