Dissidence and Guideposts…

So, I jumped head first into my “purposeful journey”, beginning with my goal of losing weight within the Health and Wellness Theme. I believe that will be one piece of finding myself. I am continuing to figure that out – including a program assessment (free with my gym membership) with a personal trainer to put together a weekly workout plan, and a child-free trip to the grocery store, so I am able take the time to read labels and shop smarter. BUT, I feel as if I need to take a step backwards before I continue with the rest of the journey.

As I was thinking about what themes I wanted to explore, I was having a hard time staying on task. I kept noticing a dissidence that was occurring in my assessments of myself. It seemed I had an understanding of me before children, and another, yet definitely hazier, understanding of me after children. And I found, in some areas, there is discord between the two. For example, (before) in my career working on college campuses, I was often an advocate for diversity education. This was something that was incredibly important to me and I would often seek to educate myself on this topic. As a SAHM, (after) I am sad to say that diversity and related education do not seem to be an easy fit in my life. Even worse, I find that I, often, do not take the time to have conversations with my children about differences. So, then I ask, who am I? Are tolerance, acceptance, and embracing diversity really important to me? I want to scream a resounding YES! – But can I truly say that? So there it is…the Dissidence.

Also, while reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin, I realized that I am missing an important piece. Gretchen identifies her overarching principles and beliefs that she calls her “Twelve Commandments” and “Secrets of Adulthood”. These principles and beliefs served as guideposts throughout her happiness project. I realized that if I am going to figure out what “who I am”, and “what is next” for me, it would be helpful for me to develop and appreciate my own guideposts - plus, it seems like fun!

So, next step - analyzing the dissidence in me and identifying my principles and beliefs.

(note: if you haven’t read The Happiness Project, I HIGHLY recommend it – I randomly came upon it on New Year’s Eve day at a bookstore and I devoured it and continue to go back to it regularly).