Saturday, April 10, 2010

Past Revisited 1

Recently I pulled out my journals and reread them. I started journaling when I was a junior in college, which, *gasp* was almost 20 years ago. Reading about different moments in my past was incredibly enlightening. And, because I typically journaled when I was conflicted, I read about many life-altering moments. Often I would go to the journal to organize my thoughts, put together action steps and identify my goals and dreams. Other times, I simply groused about situations and issues. As I reread these entries, I learned quite a bit about how I became who I am today. Periodically, I plan to share things I have found and learned from delving into my past.

As I read back, I noticed that there were two poems I wrote, that consistently ran through my journals.  They are entitled Alone and Lost and really spoke to how I was feeling.  These feelings hung around, like a cloud of smoke, for years.  Having these poems, and periodically pulling them out to read, oddly, brought me a sense of comfort and familiarity. 

Here is the first one I wrote.


Many people
Yet still
                 No one near

                 No one close

No one who knows
Who I am
What I dream...

No one who cares.

Wow!  I am so glad that the poem no longer speaks to me like it once did.  But, I can still clearly remember the feeling - and, because it was present in my life for so long, I know it is not too far from the surface.  Being on the other side of my "alone journey", feels really good!

PAST REVISITED LESSON 1:  Every experience is temporary.  And, even when there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel, that still, - it too shall pass.

What lessons have you learned from your past?


Vanessa said...

Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!!

I've learned not to regret actions or things from my past. Because for me my actions are lessons that have made me the person who I am today, whether the actions are good or bad!

Cute blog BTW!

Momma Such said...

Thanks so much for stopping by my blog party!
I am following you and would love to have you follow me back at

Have a great weekend! :)

JDaniel4's Mom said...

Stopping by from the UBP! I enjoyed visiting your site. I am so glad things are so much better.

Alexis said...

I'm here for the UBP!
I have always kept a journal. I was just going through some boxes in my garage a couple of weeks ago and found one from when I was 20! I was a totally different person back then. It makes me appreciate my life today, I have learned so much.

The Mommy said...

Hey, that is really cool of you to keep stuff from so long ago. I love going back and reading stuff I had written long time ago

Thanks for stopping by my blog

5 Kids With Disabilities said...

Heartfelt poem.
Isn't it amazing how we change as we get older? Hopefully, we've changed for the better once we figure life out!
LIndsey Petersen

Traci said...

We seem to be on very simiar paths. I could have written that poem many a day. Like you, however, it is not so true anymore. I applaud you for having kept your journas. I have been an intermittent journaler. I would start and stop. Re-read what I wrote and decide I was a big whiner and throw away the whole thing. I wonder how I would feel now if I could look back at my Doc Marten wearing self? Oh well. My blog has become my journal and I can't just throw it away. :-)
Thanks for stopping by. I'll be back.

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